Exposing My Last Texts Between Me and the Sharpe Family Singers
A lot of people don’t know this about Bedwetters staff writer Emily Hammond, but I am actually distantly related to The Sharpe Family Singers. You know, the viral singing family who have garnered a massive 8.6 million followers on TikTok, paraded the America’s Got Talent stage, and are currently on a U.S singing tour? Me and these guys go WAYYYYYY back. My dad was Ron’s college roommate and yeah he tried girls in college 😜😜😜.. I mean, look at this photo from when I was born!!
I love these fuckers so much it makes me tingle!
It’s so awesome to see cousin Sharpes thriving. Like, these guys are untouchable. With their undeniable stage presence, palpable chemistry, and angelic vocal blend, I really can’t think of a single “L” these guys have taken. So maybe it's time I change that by poking a little fun at my close family friends. Guys, consider yourselves EXPOSED 😂😂😂. Anyways, here are some of my more recent texts between me and the fam bam.
ME AND MY BOY LOGAN 😂😂😂
LOL Logan what a pussy! You literally cannot get a single drink in this guy without him getting empathetic as FUCK. Love him though, total bitch. Hey Logan, need to borrow a tampon??
ME AND FUCKING SAMANTHA ❤️❤️❤️
I love this bitch but damn it if she can’t scrap. One time she called me “skinny and fat in all the wrong places” and we literally fought until I almost died!! LMAO like I literally was in the ICU. She will not hesitate to hit you in between the eyes until your hearing stops. Love her though, she’s the kind of bitch that will let you know if there’s food in your teeth! #mymainhoeeee
ME AND RON “THAT CRAZY MOFO” 😜😜🤷♂️
I don’t know what to say about this other than he must’ve been written by a woman because… Olivia Rodrigo? Ron knows all about Guts cuz he’ll get all up in yours! I hate hugging Ron sometimes because his breath is warm and rotten like an old dog, and this guy won’t finish his dental chew. He’s also similar to a dog in that his junk is always hanging the fuck out 😭😭😭.
DA TWINNIEEZZZZZ AIDAN AND CONNOR 👬
We fight like siblings, what can I say! I don’t talk to Connor though I genuinely don’t care to hear what he says or thinks or even cares about. If he came to me in a time of need I would not help him because I don’t care. Aidan is fine and it always shocks me how drastically different they are and how much more deserving of nice things and kindness Aidan is.
AND I’M BAD LIKE THE BARBARA 🥰🥰
This hoe is literally my second mother, I love her so much and I cannot stand to be apart from her. We get into it sometimes, but love conquers all. I do feel like every man that has ever dated her hasn’t really loved her because it's impossible to be anything but surface level with her. She’s boring, the worst singer of the group, and her pussy stanks. But she’s trying and I love her for that. I also think she should get work done!
IN CONCLUSION
I consider myself so lucky to be a part of the Sharpe army. Check out their performances on Youtube, Instagram, and TikTok! And hey, never stop singing!